Just weight

Posted: July 11, 2013 in Personal, Poetry
Tags: , , , , , , ,
I like those weights
    the metal ones I pump,
    that make me feel good,
    that make me stronger,
    the last rep that I can barely lift
    (and since I have no spotters
    I must take care),
    that feel so good when I’m done.

But some days, I’m crushed by weights….

…the weight of expectations 
    (mine or someone else’s)

…the weight of all those feather-light papers
    piled up on surfaces,
    all needing to be sorted, filed, tossed,
    dealt with by a mind tired of dealing

…the weight of a night-dark day at noon,
   rain bucketing from the sky
   onto already soaked surfaces,
   returning to the hot air
   only more stickiness

…the weight of waiting to sell a house
   that I live in alone
   in a pristine existence that’s not real,
   keeping up the perfection,
   trying to remember where I put the things I need
   for the minutia of daily living

…the weight of being the person always helping,
   never needing help,
   the tiredness of always lifting someone else
   up from where they’ve fallen,
   sometimes feeling I have the imprint of shoe tread
   on my face
   from being pushed down, forgotten

…the weight of knowing that no matter what is crushing me,
   so many have it worse,
   that when I wake tomorrow,
   my optimism will be back,
   papers will be filed, tossed and sorted,
   the sun shining,
   the house clean,
   people lifted from the muck 
   the expectations met 
…the muscles a bit stronger.

Just wait.

(On a more mundane, less poetic level, I might add the almost unbearable annoyance of WordPress making it as difficult as possible to
format a poem and additionally, to only eke out that formatting on a dark background.)
  1. Dear Janet,

    Wow. Amazing piece of work, but makes me ache for you in its truth. The weight of feather-light papers. I know that one all too well.

    I hope today’s a better day.



  2. Joe Owens says:

    This is beautiful Janet. I can identify with your words in many ways. Trying to be a good friend can sometimes leave you feeling alone.

    • Thanks, Joe. Some days are just like that, when everything seems to crash down. But as the Bible says, joy comes on the morning or, if not joy, at least peace…and sunshine. 🙂

      I think that being a friend is a gift God’s given me and I try to use it lavishly and well. Sometimes, though, it can be hard even though the rewards are worth it in the long run and sometimes it feels like it’s all outgoing with no incoming.

      Anyway, as Scarlett O’Hara famously said, “Tomorrow IS another day” and so it is.


      • Joe Owens says:

        I try so hard to live the J.O.Y. Principle, which is Jesus first, Others second and Yourself last. It was modeled for me by the lady that made sure I understood what Salvfation in Christ truly means. You are correct, sometimes it leaves you feeling all used up.

        But then you take a trip like I did last December to Belize and all your hard work is returned in spades with love of the real kind for your efforts. Or when the kids at VBS respond to the call to bring so much stuff to put in shoe boxes and you just feel like you could go on forever.

      • You’re right, Joe, and it often comes back to you from someone other than those to whom you’re giving. You don’t give to get an equal amount back but you do need to be refreshed. The Lord is always ready to do this, but sometimes you need it from other people.

  3. Nice poem, Janet. Great expressions of life’s ups and downs.

    And yes, wordpress is not poem friendly.
    A little HTML come in handy at times. like using ”      ” for indents (do not use the quotation marks)


    ” ” for a line space
    or “” for a line break

    That should help take a little weight off you. Don’t wait. Use it as soon as you can.

    • Sorry to be dense here, Randy, but if I don’t use the quotes for the indent, what do I use? Space doesn’t work, that’s for sure, as it all ultimately aligns left.

  4. oops, I thought because I put the quotes in, the HTML would show up. I was wrong. I’ll email the language to you. Sorry. I just put more weight on you for my error. You are a little dense though.(from the weight I mean) Ha. Randy

  5. julespaige says:

    I came in search of your fiction – and got pulled in by your poetry. I had a different kind of waiting this week. But I think we have all been there, that of which you speak.

    Sending hugs. My waiting can be found here:

  6. Tom Poet says:

    I love this poem because of how truthful you are in it. I just want you to know how much I appreciate the weight you have lifted for me every week when you proofread my articles. You are a kind person and do not ever change. I would gladly lift any weight for you.

  7. So true, Janet. All those weights – they leave us wondering when our shaking arms will refuse to hold them up any more. But we don’t have the option of putting them down.

    On a more helpful mundane note, I hope – I’ve found that if you write the original version of a poem in your word processor, then copy and paste it into WordPress, the line breaks will stay where you want them to be.