Posts Tagged ‘how not to give a compliment’

There’s more to giving a compliment than you might think. Consider this “compliment” given by a girl with whom I went to high school. Pretend I’d just gotten a haircut. Her response upon viewing the result would be along the lines of, “You look SO much better.”   Perhaps it was just my high school lack of confidence, but that never really seemed to bode well for the way she thought I used to look or was she simply saying that the way I looked before was so terrible that anything, even this unflattering look, was preferable? Not my idea of a compliment.

One word that should never appear in a compliment is “but” or what we like to call “a but monkey.” An example of this might be, “You look great, honey, but don’t you think that dress is a little short/long/loose/tight/young?” Stop after “honey” and you’re good. Tack on a but monkey and the ice isn’t only thin, it’s giving way as you speak, plunging you into waters that can cause death in seconds. (more…)