Posts Tagged ‘random’

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A license plate that just said “Canada”, no province.  Could I get one that just says, “United States?” (more…)

“A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.”

Herm Albright quotes (1876 – 1944)

 

Now that spring’s here, so are the rains and what you need to make your travels much easier is Rain-X. Put Rain-X on your windshield (be sure to clean it thoroughly first) and the next time you drive through the rain, the rain will roll right off the top of your windshield! I’m not kidding. (more…)

Seen on a church sign….

Put your creed in your deed.

I like it.
Catchy.
Simple to say.
Hard to do.
Put what you believe into everything you do every day.
Do as well as you can every day you can.

You won’t be the only one to benefit.

For a long time we didn’t have a phone that could utilize the caller ID feature included with our phone package and I never thought anything of it. But after we got our latest set of phones, caller ID showed up and my life has never been the same again (thankfully in a good way.) (more…)

I’m always seeing things that make me laugh or hearing things that don’t come out correctly or just stuff that’s weird and not as I’d expect it to be. Don’t give me any scientific explanations for any of it, either. It ruins the fun.

In no particular order….

When I’m at a restaurant and a waiter/waitress/waitperson/server comes up, they’ll often say, “If you need me, my name is (fill in the blank).” OK, what’s your name if I don’t need you? Sorry, but it’s a struggle for me every time someone says this not take ask them that follow-up question. I don’t, but I’d really, really like to.

Why do pancake recipes tell you to only turn the pancakes once? What horrible thing could possibly happen if you turned them a third time? What about 4 or 5 times? I’ll be brutally honest (and you don’t even have to bring out the comfy chair)….I have turned pancakes more than one and occasionally maybe even four times. Does that make me a bad person? What did it do to the person who ate the pancake so terribly abused? Please don’t tell anyone.

Why is it that leftover pancake batter, like diamonds, is forever? I can fill the empty bowl with water and let it sit all day. When I pour the water out, the leftover mix is still at the bottom, seemingly just as it was hours earlier. Even if I carefully wipe everything, then wash thoroughly, there always seems to be some pasted-on, dried-up batter somewhere, hanging on, like a barnacle on the bottom of boat, for dear life. I guess that’s why you can make paste with flour. Makes me wonder what my insides look like? Guess all those enzymes and things in there are pretty tough!!

Why should anyone selling coffee or any coffee-related beverage, tea or hot (remember the “hot” part) chocolate (excluding all designer drinks that have any of these in them but are made cold), have to put cautions on the cups or elsewhere warning people that the beverage is hot? (Do NOT give me the legal reasons. Just don’t.) You wanted a hot beverage; you paid for a hot beverage; you’re annoyed if your hot beverage isn’t hot. Why wouldn’t you expect it to be hot and behave accordingly? Now if you ordered iced tea and it was hot, you’d have something about which to complain.

Our mailman isn’t male. I guess that makes her a mailwoman, but not a male woman. Mailperson not male person. And no one, male or female, wants to be a garbageperson.

Have you ever thought about how many brain cells are occupied with words from songs from your past? I can hear something from the 60’s or 70’s and often chime right in without realizing I even know so many of the words! Some of the songs were shorter but still. For instance, I know all the words to “Secret Agent Man”, “Red Rubber Ball” and “Happy Together”, but I also know “Bye, bye Miss American Pie” and “Scenes from an Italian Restaurant”, plus lots and lots of things…including much of “Smoke on the Water”. Anyone for a rousing round of “Inagaddadavida”? Would I be a brain surgeon (maybe on my own brain) or a rocket scientists if I had all those cells otherwise occupied? But if the latter, then I couldn’t say “It isn’t rocket science”, because it would be.

Having done and proofed bulletins and newsletters as well as having been part of a committee to re-work the constitution of our church, I’ve always wondered at the plethora of extraneous capital letters that abound in church missives. “We will meet in the Narthex of the Church. The Pastor will lead the Congregation in singing from the Song Book. Please remember that Dogs are not allowed in Church any day of the Week, unless they are Service Dogs.” (Sorry about the pun.)

Did you ever think about the fact that a fiend is only one letter removed from a friend? Literally one letter removed. Makes you think.

I’ve learned a number of miscellaneous things during my life. Here are a few that have come to mind recently.

• It’s difficult to get out of a used bookstore without buying something. It’s easier in a “regular” bookstore because everything costs more there.
• Nails with polish grow faster than unpolished nails. They just do. Don’t ask me why.
• People have bigger feet now than in my generation. I know this because all the good size 9’s tend to be gone if I wait too long.
• All shoes look cute when they’re size 5. They look very different in size 9.
• Hair will stick to everything.
• Hair sticks best anywhere you can’t see it.
• Hair sticks best to things of contrasting colors.
• The computer is always able (and often willing) to do something you don’t want to do or that you don’t know how to change or get rid of once the computer’s done it.
• Laundering Kleenex is easier than laundering money, but they both have messy results.
• If you set a bottle down, put the lid on tightly even if you think the bottle’s out of the way. The risk of knocking over the bottle (no matter where it is) is inversely proportionate to how tightly the lid is on the bottle. (Tight lid, low risk; no lid, bottle’s going over.)
• A few people are your “friends” simply and solely because they’re married to someone you really like.
• Everyone you meet is your superior in some way. Very useful for keeping things in proportion.
• That means you’re superior to everyone in some way. Useful for not getting an inferiority complex.
• You will almost always get a phone call when you are as far away from the phone as possible. My husband is a master of this, so much so that I sometimes wonder if he has CCTV in our house.
• Mice must be contortionists because they can get in anywhere.
• If they get in, mice will eat anything.
• Mice like peanut butter better than cheese. That’s good because peanut butter is cheaper and stays on the trap better.
• You can get a mouse out of the trap and into a plastic bag without ever touching it.
• If water sits around, it will get into somewhere you don’t want it to be. Or it will become a mosquito apartment complex. Either one is bad.
• If you don’t save your work on the computer regularly, you will lose something you didn’t want or couldn’t afford to lose.
• The best time to see a misspelled word in an email is when you’ve just hit “Send”.
• Tomato and tea will stain almost anything and are nigh to impossible to get out.
• Children’s songs stick in your head forever. Perhaps you should sing all your advice to your children…or have Sharon, Lois and Bram sing it.